I have always aimed to be positive might not always show but I try

Yesterday was amazing great ride then some amazing food and relaxing then off to a party saw lots of mates and drank even more beer a great evening that went by in what seemed like a minute how good an evening was it I woke up and did not recognise my voice till I drank something but no headache so that is a win

So I was at the top of the hill happy healthy not hungover then today plummeted back down the other side.

A birthday should be a day you enjoy where someone or maybe some people make you feel important, wanted and that you matter. Well that did not happen at all I feel I would say upset but I think it’s more let down, disappointment angry and borderline bitter. Which I don’t want to be at anytime especially on my birthday.

Unfortunately I feel all those things and the thing is yes I feel that way to everyone who given five seconds of there time today to show me that I matter. But I also fell that way towards myself. I always give what ever is needed to others I take the time at anytime to reply to engage.

Why is it so hard for others to do that to me. I like them have a busy life full time job and everything.

I am not asking for this all the time occasionally to be told you matter is a great thing but especially on someone’s birthday and you have spoken to them about birthdays and plans then you don’t do anything and I mean anything at all the only thing I can think to say is shame on you.

Anyway the weekend is almost over and we might actually get some rain next week so il be happy until then I still hope my friends are well just make an effort if I can you can because you are my friends and you are amazing